Why Pregnancy #4 Finally Made Me a Super Mom

Y’all.  Pregnancy #4 is no joke.  Not that any of them were a walk in the park, but for the most part, I enjoyed being pregnant with the first three.  And as much as I am trying to enjoy this pregnancy, there are some major differences this time around…not to mention some new excuses.  I’m three and a half years older than last time, have a very active three and a half year old son who won’t stop.  Ever.  And, I’m working part time outside of the home.

And I’m tired.  All.of.the.time.  I don’t sleep well.  In fact, I actually kept track last night that I was up 8 times from 11 pm-5am.  Peeing, mostly, but I also suffer from Restless Leg Syndrome and 8 months Pregnant and Can’t Get Comfortable Syndrome.  So I wander a bit, trying to tidy up, checking email, getting some water.  And then I spend about 13 minutes arranging my pillows “just so” again, which of course, makes my heartburn flare up.  So I spend 4 minutes rolling over to reach my Tums (the Costco-sized container), just to roll over and spend another 7 minutes getting comfortable.  I drift off to sleep…and wake to realize that I have to pee again.

But the biggest difference this pregnancy has impressed on me, is my attitude toward self care.  I am tired and feel more uncomfortable at this point than I remember from the past pregnancies…and therefore, I feel grumpier in general.  But,  I think this may be a blessing in disguise.  For whatever reason, this pregnancy I’m allowing myself to be honest with myself and to those around me.  At church, I had an acquaintance ask me how I was feeling.  He probably didn’t even really care, and in the past I probably would have responded “hanging in there” or “pretty good.”  But this time, I responded, “puffy, full, hungry and tired.”  All of which were completely true of that moment.  And I was proud of myself for being honest with someone instead of sugar coating it.

I realized that with my past pregnancies, I was still in “super-mom” mode.  I was determined to prove that I could handle life while pregnant the same exact way as I would any other day.  I kept my “glow” face on and cleaned my house and got on the floor to play with my kids and said “yes” to every volunteer opportunity.  Because I wanted to show that I was more than just a whiny pregnant lady.

But this time around, my feelings are a little different toward all of that.  Not to mention, I am definitely “feeling” all of the aches and pains and sicknesses with this one.  But I am consciously saying “no” to stuff that normally I would have done.  For example, my town does a Charity Kitchen Tour in our historic district.  And if you volunteer for part of it, you get discounted tickets.  So every year, my mom and I volunteer for half of the day, and then spend the other half walking through historic homes all over town, while tasting gourmet food in each kitchen.  I LOVE it….seriously one of the highlights of my year.  But this year, I said “no.”  Because the thought of standing and walking all day on my puffy feet sounded like no fun.  And probably wouldn’t be healthy for me, let’s be honest.Today, I took 2 cat naps, and did some work from my couch, with my feet up.  On Saturday, my kids and I ate ice cream for dinner.  I’ve had two prenatal massages this month (and thanks to Groupon, still have one more!!).   I started letting my kids walk the entire 50 feet home from the bus stop by themselves, because I don’t feel like standing out in the heat for 15 minutes.  When my husband isn’t traveling, I let him cook dinner or we go out.  I stopped cleaning my house and hired someone to do it for me a couple of times a month.  I added laundry to my 8 year-olds’ chore list because all of the bending and lifting makes me want to throw up.  Instead of grumbling under my breath that the heavy kitchen trash hasn’t been taken out (and then doing it myself anyway), I’ve upgraded to nagging loudly until someone else carries that stinky, heavy beast outside.

In a nutshell, I’ve finally admitted to myself that I am still a “super-mom.”  Mostly because I’m growing a 4th miracle inside of me, while still managing to keep the other ones alive.  I’m physically trying to take care of myself, rather than just “dealing with” pregnancy symptoms while still trying to do it all.  And sometimes that means I’m putting some of that burden on my family members.  But, I’m slowly seeing them taking more responsibility around the house in general, and helping out even when they aren’t asked. I’m honest with them about how I’m feeling, and they are starting to understand the importance of helping out a little more.  Tonight at dinner, I accidentally knocked a stack of napkins off of the table and my 8 year old rushed to pick them up for me, stating that she “knew that bending over made my heart burn.”  My heart is thankful that I have been honest with her about some of my symptoms.

And today, while I was on the couch, I got some quality snuggle-time with the three year old…who normally wouldn’t stop to snuggle (especially since Wild Kratts wasn’t on).  And he curled up next to me, marveling at his brother moving around in my belly…”Ow! He kicked me!  That’s not nice, but I’ll forgive him.”  And once again, I was glad that I took a little time to rest my body and put up my swollen feet…because it allowed for a few moments of prenatal brotherly bonding that wouldn’t have taken place if I was doing the laundry.

I’ve got about 5 weeks left….I think I’ll go put my feet up.

Palmettos and Pigtails Signature

Comments

  1. Hey babe,
    Sounds like you are having a tough time of it, but if anyone can cope with it is SHARA THE SUPER MOM : – )
    I should cancel my trip to New York on the 20th and come and see you.Hang in there as it isnt long now girl, only around 35 sleeps 🙂

    Look forward to your next post when the baby is here and you are on a super high!

    BIG Scottish HUG

    Neil

Speak Your Mind

*

CommentLuv badge